Friday, December 19, 2014

Hard

I have had one of the hardest weeks of my life this week.

It's Friday and I am so glad to have made it to today, by God's grace.

He is so faithful.

I have much to learn about parenting a child with depression.  But I am thankful for all that God has taught me so far, and for just BEING with me as I struggle, and learn, and soldier on.  Our girl has had such a difficult fall and at times her grief has very nearly overwhelmed her.  In an attempt to not feel it to the point of being overwhelmed, she masks her grief and pain in anger.  And because I am in authority over her, am a safe person who has shown her unconditional love, and mostly because I'm here, that anger is nearly always directed at me.

It is a hard, hard thing to endure, even when I cognitively understand it.

And it is made even harder by the fact that the other children take up offenses for me.  At times the needs of various children appear to be at exact polar opposites, and meeting the needs of one can seem to have the effect of harming another.

BUT GOD.....

God can take what appears to be emotional harm and transform it into something else.  Something beautiful.  My mama's heart aches for my children who are in the midst of transformation.  I'm sure the butterfly isn't comfortable just before it breaks out of its crysallis, either.  But when God gives me glimpses of what He is accomplishing in my children's lives, it is absolutely amazing.

Please pray for our girl to let us comfort her.  Pray that she will trust completely in who God is.  Pray for daily strength and wisdom and grace for us as her parents.  And praise God with me that He is who He says He is, and He does what He has promised to do!

1 comment:

Teacher/Mom said...

Oh, but I can feel the pain and sorrow in your words! I think you know I can relate in many ways to what you are experiencing. I will continue to pray for your sweet girl, and your whole family, that the path He has you walking would bring blessings to you and glory to Him. You are doing such a wonderful job, and I'm confident that God is working through you and in you each and every day! Love and hugs my sweet friend!